Chapter 79 A Little Feeling

The stones around us were very uneven in size and the torch we had made was extremely resistant to water. I was actually more worried that Fatty would set the whole place on fire once he got rid of his torch. Under the light of the flickering flames, we could see the rain curtain around us and the King Yama corpse standing amidst the shadows. It all felt a little surreal as Fatty pulled out his remaining grenades and stuffed one into my hand, “One to get his attention, the other to jump up behind him. We’ll solve it the old-fashioned way.”

I figured the reason we succeeded last time was entirely due to luck and not caring about our lives, not to mention the fact that the last detonator was very powerful and there were so many people running around and making the scene chaotic. Now, this 3P situation had caught me up in its rhythm and I felt like I was fucking asking for death. Fatty told me not to worry but my calves were already feeling a little weak.

When I looked back at Short Feng, he revealed a cunning smile peculiar to foreigners. “Sorry, I don’t know much about Chinese customs.”

“Aren’t you a fucking Chinese expert?”

“No such thing,” Short Feng said. “I still have to go back and see Christ when I die but I don’t know the way back.”

As I was thinking over these witty remarks, Fatty had already begun to make threatening gestures in front of the corpse. “Come on, come to grandpa. Grandpa can also ‘gegege’ so how about you show me a ‘ge’.”

Before he had finished speaking, the dim luster on that thing’s body suddenly flashed and Fatty went flying. He crashed into the rocks on the side and then rolled to the ground.

I was shocked to see him fly away, but when I looked back, I saw something flash in front of me. My chest was pushed so hard that my whole body smacked against the rocks and the grenade slipped out of my hand and rolled into a nearby crack in the stone.

The movement was so fast that I cursed distractedly as I tried to crawl up. I hadn’t even stood up fully before I suddenly felt something step on my back and a huge force trample me. Then, the thing reached down with one hand and broke my left elbow joint with hardly any effort.

I heard the misaligned bone joints clicking and realized in horror that it was going to break my arm.

Shit, King Yama riding the dead? This fucker was trying to ride me! Wasn’t this bastard supposed to be riding female corpses?!

“You motherfucker!” I cried. “Fatty, this guy wants me to do S&M! The bastard clearly can’t distinguish between men and women!”

Fatty was lying in the dark in the distance—the torch had flown somewhere farther away—and there wasn’t any movement. Was he dead?

There was suddenly a loud snap as my left hand joint was dislocated. I was trembling in pain and yelling and kicking my legs as my right hand was then lifted up. This guy had so many hands and was strong enough to split my body into six pieces.

My right hand had just been bent to its limit when Short Feng suddenly ran over and hit that thing on the leg that was standing on me. The knee cap was always vulnerable, especially since this corpse’s knee was soft and already applying pressure on my poor body.

I pushed the sharp pain to the back of my mind and immediately rolled away, the knee that had previously been pressed against my waist hitting the ground with such force that it caused it to shake. If it had been pressed against my back, I figured excrement, urine, and any internal organs would all come out of my armpits.

As Short Feng grabbed my legs and pulled me out of that thing’s attack range, I pointed at the crack in the stone and shouted, “Grenade!”

Short Feng went over to pick it up, suddenly bowed his head, dodged an unexpected strike, and then used an especially effeminate move to throw the grenade over before throwing himself to the ground.

When the grenade fell under the armored body, Short Feng shouted loudly, “Bang!”

“Bang, your ass!” I was so angry I felt as if my eyes were about to burst. “Did you pull the pin out?”

“I’m not familiar with Chinese traditions!” He said while covering his head.

“Are German grenades voice-activated?” I dragged my injured hand and hid behind a nearby stone. At this time, I suddenly saw the trap Zhang Haixing had made before.

<Chapter 78><Table of Contents><Chapter 80>

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Whew, this chapter is a rollercoster of emotions. Worried about poor Fatty getting thrown around (again), cracking up at Wu Xie yelling at Fatty to save him from the corpse trying to do S&M play, fretting over Wu Xie getting hurt, cheering for Feng coming to the rescue, and then face-palming at Feng thinking the grenade would just magically explode lol.

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Updated 2/12/2022