2019 Mid-Autumn Festival Extra

During the Mid-Autumn Festival (1), Zhang Haike wanted to host a family banquet.

My family usually held a small gathering for the Mid-Autumn Festival, so I would stay with them and have dinner. That was our usual routine for the day. There were so many festivals that it was impossible to celebrate them all. It wasn’t like I was an ancient person who might not return home alive whenever I went on a business trip, and it wasn’t like my family members were spread out all over the country. Since all of my family was in Hangzhou, I got to see them often, which made it hard to act like we were having a touching reunion for the Mid-Autumn Festival.

But the Zhang family reunion dinner was of great importance to Zhang Haike. He wanted to use any means to unite the Zhang family and revive their power, but it was all just wishful thinking. To me, this was just a restoration of the decadent clan system that the Zhang clan used to use. It was useless and just wasted a lot of money and manpower.

But as the actual caretaker of Zhang Qiling, I had an indescribable feeling that I was going to be responsible for the cost of this family banquet, and I’d even have to arrange it. I didn’t know why I should be the one to do it, but there didn’t seem to be a reason to stop them. I guess this group of Zhang family members were really just too pitiful.

It was as if a lot of poor relatives were coming to Poker-Face. No one else would give them the time of day if I chose to ignore them.

If Poker-Face said something, then it was fine, but he wouldn’t say anything. Instead, Zhang Haike kept telling me that as Zhang Qiling’s entourage, I should take care of these things. Fuck that shit, I thought to myself. I’m a guardian, not an attendant. He said that if I did well, I could start the special procedures that would give me the surname Zhang. I could be called Zhang Xie or Zhang Wu Xie in the future. Of course, I could also follow my master and be called Zhang Qixie.

I was so angry that day that I thought my liver was going to burst.

I originally thought that the hotel might mistakenly believe that it was a Mid-Autumn Festival activity organized by a pyramid scheme group, so I specially found a small hotel without a large auditorium and no audio equipment. I figured a few random tables of food would be enough. If Zhang Haike wanted to do more, he could pay out of pocket and set up something big in a few days. All I cared about was whether he could gather the scattered group of unemployed Zhang family members without my help.

But since I was really angry, I changed my mind and rented a relatively high-end clubhouse. Instead of having a typical Chinese-style party, I had a standing, buffet-style formal party.

I also rolled out a red carpet and hired a photographer, DJ, and bartender. I set up advertisements and mobile game links, told attendees that they had to wear formal attire, and set up a large screen advertising Wushanju.

In this way, if Zhang Haike did anything else, it would be like the party before the collapse of the financial world, or the Guardian Auction House’s second autumn party. In any case, at least it wouldn’t be seen as a pyramid scheme.

I didn’t go. I stayed at Wushanju during the Mid-Autumn Festival and played “Fight the Landlord” (2) with Fatty and a shop assistant. I was sneering as I was playing, knowing that I would definitely beat Zhang Haike this time.

Later, I saw a lot of videos of this family banquet on TikTok (3). They were all wearing suits and standing at the entrance of the clubhouse, looking lost. Passers-by thought it was a new variety show that was being filmed, so many people took photos and made TikTok videos. When Zhang Haike saw that the situation was good, he stood up on the flower bed and began attracting the passers-by to join the Zhang family.

There was a huge crowd there. Next door was a public square where people were dancing, and on the other side was a live broadcast of the dance for those sitting at home.

Everything was so peaceful, just like the moon today.

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival, everyone!!!!

<Extra: Some of Wu Xie’s Thoughts><Table of Contents><[Interlude ] 520 Nine Unsent Letters>

****

TN Notes:

(1) Traditional moon-viewing festival on the 15th of the 8th lunar month. Also known as the Mooncake Festival. Info here.

(2) Aka “Dou dizhu”. It’s one of the most popular card games played in China. It’s played among 3 people with 1 pack of cards, including the two differentiated jokers. The game starts with players bidding for the “landlord” position. Those who lose the bid or don’t bid enter the game as the “peasants” team competing against the landlord. The objective of the game is to be the first player to have no cards left. Info here.

(3) App for creating and sharing short videos